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The Community of Disc Golfers and About All Things Disc Golf

Ladies and Gentlemen,

There has been so many serious discussions lately, that I am creating this one to relieve some tension. I love jokes, funny stories, and quotes. So use this post as a means of telling something funny and hopefully put a smile on other people's faces. I'll start things off..........

You know when you've reached the Masters when you body goes out more then you do.

or

What's my handicap?
* Driving and putting

or

"Yelling at your disc will not help you. Unless you do it when your opponent is putting."

or

"Golf and sex are about the only things I can enjoy without being good at."

or

"If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong disc"

or

“If I had driven the green and cleared the trees, it would’ve been a great shot.”

or

"I average three under. One under a tree; one under a bush; one under the water."


Now it's your turn. Put something funny, and we'll all be able to laugh.

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Norbert was lucky and had hooked up with a beautiful woman at a sleazy hotel.  While lying in bed, about to have sex, the young lady tells Norbert, "I have a confession to make, I'm not a virgin."

The Norbert replies, "That's no big thing in this day and age."

The girl continues, "Yeah, I've been with one other Disc Golfer."

"Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"

“His name was Kory Olko”

"Kory Olko, isn’t he married?"

"Yeah, but we had hooked up before he got married."

"Well he's handsome, and he throws a pretty good disc. I can see why you went to bed with him."

After the small talk, Norbert and the young woman made passionate love. When they got done, Norbert gets up and skips to the telephone.

"What are you doing?" asks the woman.
Norbert replies, "I'm hungry.  I was going to call room service and get some food."

"Kory wouldn't do that."

"Oh yeah? What would Kory do?"

"He'd come back to bed and do it a second time."

Norbert puts down the phone and goes back to bed to have sex with his
lady a second time. When they finish, he gets up and walks over to the phone.

"What are you doing?" she says.

Norbert says, "I'm still hungry.  So I was going to call room service to get some damn food."

"Kory wouldn't do that."

"Oh yeah? What would Kory do?"

"He'd come back to bed and do it again."

Norbert slams down the phone and reluctantly goes back to bed and makes love to his companion
one more time. When they finished he is exhausted, extremely wore out and beat. He drags himself over to the phone and starts to dial.

The young lady asks, "Are you calling room service?"

Norbert yells...."No! Before I die, I'm calling Kory Olko to find out what's par for this hole!"

HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN:

Compliment her,
cuddle her,
kiss her,
caress her,
love her,
stroke her,
tease her,
comfort her,
protect her,
hug her,
hold her,
spend money on her,
wine and dine her,
buy things for her,
listen to her,
care for her,
stand by her,
support her,
go to the ends of the earth for her...

 

HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN:

Show up naked.
With a disc in one hand and a beer in the other.

You always say YES!!!

Handsome and I throw a good disc.....Sweet!!!

 

Poor Norbert better get some viagra!!!!

Thought all this was supposed to about humor?

Hmmmmm seems more about insults.

I wasn't insulted. LOL

Yeah well your name and business were not stated.

 

You are right Norbert.  I apologize to you and hope that your business will not be harmed in anyway.  To the DiscGolfersR.Us world, I officially apologize.
Accepted.

Two disc golfers were standing over looking the St John's river at Debary while playing hole one.

Brock looks to Henry and says, "Look at those idiots fishin' in the rain."

Here is something really funny.

I am on vacation and I'm gonna compete in the Sarasota Amateur Championships.

Why do Disc Golfers always carry an extra pair of trousers with them ?
Just in case they get a hole in one.

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