"i understand that u will always b prone 2 take ur husband's side, but maybe if u understand that i have just gotten out of a abusive relationship, and that i will never let another man get in my face like that again, so yes i did take it as…"
"i do hope u come play as many tourns as u want and dont let this effect ur game or the fun u have with it. i in no way blame u or have any bad feelings towards u. I am very upset with the way ur husband handled him self and i know u weren't…"
"I don't know why you told the P.D.G.A. that your disc went "O.B" when no one in our group saw it go O.B. Because we didn't find your disc in the bushes where we ALL saw it last, you/we CANNOT "assume" your disc went…"
I have enjoyed our rounds together at tournaments in the past, but I cannot sit back and listen to and watch you slander my husband for something that he was NOT wrong in doing. I won’t ignore it just to avoid conflict. The last time I checked we were supposed to be playing disc golf, because it was fun. Which is exactly what I said to you Sunday when you did join our group. This experience is taking ALL OF THE FUN OUT OF IT for me and Marty. It is just a game in which we have the emmense gift of flinging little pieces of plastic around beautiful parks and hopefully enjoy the company of our companions when we do it. Win or lose. I would suggest that you reflect on that idea, and the character that is displayed in this type of reaction…..I would have hoped that your would have taken the penalty as a learning experience, but instead you took it as a personal offense.
Marty in NO WAY brought this up to help me win a tournament. He brought it up, because he is a man of integrity that knew that the score you turned in did not reflect what happened on that hole. Winning is not worth losing his integrity over, & he certainly has never tried to win at any cost in all of his years of playing disc golf – he isn’t about to start that now for himself or for me!
Quite frankly at this point, I would rather not play another tournament this year or maybe ever if this is what it's going to be like. What a sad thought! But it is NOT worth this to go out and play this sport.
Marty asked to see your card at least 4 times after the round on Saturday to try to review that hole with the group before we turned in our cards. You were embarrassed by your round and didn’t want anyone to even confirm your score – direct quote “I don’t care if it’s wrong, I’ll take the 2 strokes” because you had a bad around. Everyone has bad rounds. You told me that Marty had kept score after that hole & saw the cards and could have brought it up before the round was over when he had the cards. Marty would not have disrupted your round that way – it would have been rude and inappropriate to bring it up before the round was over! It would have risked skrewing with your head and messing up your last holes. He waited for the round to be over, and asked to see your card multiple times. You chose not to show him your card, which is your right. However, the consequences are then what you predicted, you ended up with a 2 stroke penalty for turning in your card with the wrong score.
I don’t know how or why your think Marty could force a TD at any PDGA sanctioned tournament NOT to follow the PDGA rules. He did however insist that they follow the PDGA rules regarding a lost disc and a practice throw and the required additional 2 stroke penalty.
I have no doubt that you were in NO WAY attempting to cheat. I have never had reason to question the integrity of your competition. However, the fact remains that your disc was lost in the rest of our group’s mind. I never heard you express that you saw it go into the water. None of the rest of us saw that happen. We saw it hit in the bush & quite frankly were surprised when we didn’t find it in the bush. But as Marty pointed out, just because we didn’t find it where we expected to, does NOT mean that we can assume that it went OB.
Brian called 3 minutes for a LOST disc. There is no 3 minute rule in conjunction with looking for an OB disc. Because of my confidence that we all agreed that the disc was lost, I never even brought this up in the discussions Saturday or Sunday. It never occurred to me that you would have been thinking that the disc had gone OB until you sent your message to Marty.
I am greatly sorry that there was a misunderstanding and miscommunication on that point.
That being said – I’m am seriously frustrated, sad, and hugely offended that you are accusing Marty of not “man-ing up” to his not knowing the rules – wow, he’s only been a PDGA official for like 10+ years. Not to mention that you are accusing him of not only yelling at you, but apparently basically assaulting you physically by saying that TC had to pull him off of you. I was not standing right in the midst of that conversation, but I can tell you that I only heard one person yelling that morning & that was you – yelling & cursing at a fellow golfer for calling you on a rule that he tried to prevent from being an issue the night before. I never once heard his or any male’s voice raised in that interaction. I am also quite confident that when I discussed the situation with TC later that day that he would have told me if Marty had done anything remotely like what you are describing since it would be completely in appropriate for him to behave in such a manner.
Wow, Melodie, I'm hardly sure where to start in responding to your continued drama about this incident. I guess I will start by clarifying what it was that I saw happen on that hole - which from what I understand is also the perception that our fourth player (Brian) had as well.
Brian & I very clearly saw it hit the same bush. Neither of us saw it go into the water after it hit that bush. Our ENTIRE group (including Marty) looked for your disc for at least 3 minutes. Brian finally called 3 minutes for the lost disc since we did not find it. At which point, Marty went back to his lie to get ready to throw. Brian gave you the spot to throw & he later admitted to forgetting the rule for a lost disc. I silently consented & here is where I accept some blame for the situation. I had an inkling that he was indicating the wrong lie, BUT I am not that competitive & I don’t worry about strictly enforcing adherance to the rules in my group so I wasn’t worried about it, especially with a 2 person division. However, what I should have done was stop you from throwing & said that I wasn’t sure that was the correct ruling & called Marty over to discuss it RIGHT then & there – which would have truly allowed for a group consensious.
Marty, on the other hand, feels strongly that the rules should be adhered to, especially by those playing in the Open Division. He is NOT remotely wrong in that feeling. In fact, I feel greatly convicted now that if I am going to play in the open division, that I should be sure that not only am I playing by the rules of the sport but so are my competitors – whether the infraction is intentional or not.
I don't know why you told the P.D.G.A. that your disc went "O.B" when no one in our group saw it go O.B. Because we didn't find your disc in the bushes where we ALL saw it last, you/we CANNOT "assume" your disc went O.B. Don't you think we would of found it if it had gone in the water? (The river was about 1 ft. deep, clear, and moving at a turtles pace.) As for as acting like a "jerk", well I'm NOT the one who was standing there having a tizzy fit, acting like a 5th grader, screaming and cussing at another player, who had called you on a rule violation. As far as "getting and earning everything you deserve" ( cash, strokes & player rating) when you play in tournaments, at the Chump Challenge, you received all that was due to you. Sorry you don't feel that way, I would have made the same call again, regardless of who the offending player was, because it was the RIGHT CALL! One more thing, you shouldn't blame me for YOUR loss of self control, you missed your first hole in the second round, and cried for 4 more holes, because you thought you were being treated unfairly.
hey lady... i did not move to canada permanently. i will likely be back in missoula come april or may. i really have no plans for the immediate future.i have a lot to figure out before then. i need to be single for like the next 5 years, men are driving me nuts!tell me about what's been going on w you then and when you'll be moving to missoula! hint hint!send me a private msg to dish. i hope you're doing well and after the storm comes the calm.sending you love and kisses!
happy new year and all that, i'm living in canada for now but i will call to catch up soon,when's a good time? i miss you destroyer girl! hope the changes you mentioned were positive or at least constructive... lots of love sugar. we'll talk soon! brdigrl