Yes, Mr. Zubie, received his HUGE surprise package. And the most important rule of being crowned WORST PLAYER OF THE YEAR 2008 is that you ALWAYS have to say "PEACE" to fellow players, NEVER get angry with another player (unless they are playing unfair) and ALWAYS be the diplomat of the game representing the PDGA, players WORLD wide and ALL disc golf promoters and supporters with a smile and a high five ( or something equivalently positive). and then there was this bunch of malarkey that I included with the title holders obligations - I'm sure that everyone knows very well and good how to obtain such a prestigious title but let me give you just a few tips and methods that I've used to achieve "The 2007 Worst Player Of The Year Award".
Of course, it goes without saying that you MUST play as often as possible and with as many different players as possible, while all the time missing most putts 20' and in, hitting most trees 20' and out and after nearly every shot, use profanity that is only appropriate for an individual working by themselves after hitting their thumb with a hammer. And while playing with as many different players as possible, you MUST do everything possible to anger at least three out of four players that you come in contact with; new friends and old alike, no exceptions. Most of these aspects of play are easily accomplished by most all players and especially easy for those of us that play at the level to qualify for The Worst Player Of The Year Award but it's the extra curricular involvement with the game that will require some extra extraordinary special effort.
You MUST volunteer at every possible opportunity and not only volunteer but show up late with a know it all attitude and without fail offer a solution to any situation that arises, whether asked for or not. And if your solutions can be 360 degrees from that of the club leader, tournament director or head honcho, it will only enhance your chances to get the Worst title. Now don't forget, while volunteering for as many positions as possible it will also help solidify your reputation if you back out of half of your commitments with a phone call only hours or minutes before you're supposed to arrive saying that you won't be coming due to a sore toe or some other fictitious equivalent. It will also help you to remember that the title of The Worst Player Of The Year Award isn't some local yokel thing, THINK NATIONALLY and take every opportunity to use e-mail, web sites and any other modern method of communication to find out when and where you may solidify the opinion from others that will eventually get you the votes you deserve. Volunteer your ideas to as many as possible and in as many situations that come up needing volunteer input. Submitting ideas for disc designs and club logos is one area that allows people like you to become involved, take advantage of ALL such requests. And again, don't only take advantage by submitting all of your good and bad designs, but adopt an attitude that EVERYTHING you submit is the BEST solution, always and without fail. Never hesitate to call or e-mail your opinion to as many as possible, including all that will be making final decisions, anyone involved in printing and if you really want to be known as one of the worst players, share your opposite and egocentric opinions with the sponsors as well, that will really get you a bunch of points. And as you did when pulling out of the volunteer situations, retract your submissions once and awhile saying something to the requester like "you just don't understand good art and the artist" or "for the compensation of one disc, you've already received more from me than you deserve". Depending on to whom they're directed to, either of those statements will most certainly place you in the ranking of top ten picks for (The 2008 Worst Player Of The Year Award). And don't forget, the more powerful those that you insult or anger, the better your chances will be to wear the belt, walk the walk and boast; I'm The 2008 Worst Player Of The Year Award winner, just as I'm going to wear the belt, walk the walk and boast; I'm The 2007 Worst Player Of The Year Award winner.
Now here's the hard thing to obtain and the tiny little secret weapon that nailed down the title for me. You have to do all of what I've mentioned and more, 100% of the time without any conscious thought of doing so. You must be the real you and the worst you all at the same time, all of the time. Judges can spot a fake a mile away so if you're only looking to grab a prestigious title or have some concern that your nice person reputation is in need of a change, give up the idea. To become the worst at anything it has to come from within. It's kind of like Tiger Woods, you have to be that way since childhood, trained for that greatness and be prepared to continue that greatness. It's just that in my case, I'm the worstness instead of the greatness. Believe me; it was all of the training, all of the practice and all of the hard work during my youth that brought me to a point where I'm able to play and act the worst I can whenever and wherever I involve myself and without really even knowing or trying to do what I do so well or worst.
So get all of your discs out and don't clean them, don't write your name or PDGA number on them; in fact, don't join the PDGA until late in the year and then make certain to ask for a pro-rated discount. Sign up for tournaments and then call just prior and ask for a refund, giving any excuse from car trouble to hearing rumors that your not welcome. Intensify your ability to make women, children and sensitive men run from ear shot when you start swearing. Design logos and disc for all requests possible and side step the requesters by promoting your designs to the all of the major disc manufacturers directly. Improvise in your unknowingly manner of your daily rude existence and most of all, remember this first and foremost - tell EVERYONE that EVERYTHING you do is done to promote the growth and development of disc golf, honestly.
Just Joking, Zubie and friends.
Now get your discs and godiscn
Peace In Your Universe